Creating a child-focused co-parenting plan: a step-by-step guide

When a marriage ends, a new kind of partnership begins — co-parenting. For separated or divorced parents, building a thoughtful, child-focused parenting plan is one of the most important steps in protecting children’s well-being. At Fairway Divorce Solutions, thousands of families have been guided through this process with one clear goal: protecting children while creating a parenting arrangement that works long-term.

What it means to be child-focused

A child-focused co-parenting plan prioritizes the needs of children over the preferences of parents. Instead of focusing on what feels “fair,” it asks: What does my child need to feel secure, stable, and emotionally connected to both parents?

Fairway Divorce Solutions developed the Nurtured Children Plan™, which helps separated parents create agreements that emphasize connection, developmental milestones, and adaptability — not legal positioning or power struggles.

Step 1: consider your child’s age and stage

Children have different needs at each stage of development. A flexible parenting agreement recognizes these differences:

Infants and toddlers

Security comes from rhythm, not duration. Young children benefit from short, frequent visits and consistent routines. Overnights may not be suitable if nursing continues.

Preschoolers

Predictability is key. At this age, no more than two to three nights should pass without seeing a parent. Bedtime consistency is more important than exact time splits.

School-aged children

This group thrives on clarity. They should always know where they are staying on school nights. A reliable parenting arrangement reduces stress and confusion.

Teens

Older children often prefer alternating weeks to limit constant transitions. They may also appreciate phone calls or midweek dinners with their other parent. While their input can be considered, the responsibility of decision-making should not rest on them.

Step 2: focus on quality, not equality

Shared parenting does not always mean 50/50. Equal parenting time doesn’t automatically lead to healthy connections. Work schedules, distance between homes, and children’s routines all matter. At Fairway, parents are encouraged to ask: What makes my child feel most secure and supported?

This mindset builds a healthier co parenting relationship and keeps children’s needs at the center.

Step 3: redefine custody as shared decision-making

Child custody isn’t about control — it’s about collaboration. A child-focused plan defines how decisions are made around education, health care, extracurriculars, and other important areas.

Fairway mediators guide parents in creating a framework for joint decision-making that reduces conflict. This clarity prevents disputes years later over issues such as tutoring, religious holidays, or medical care.

Step 4: address the details early

Strong co-parenting arrangements go beyond scheduling. They cover practical details that, if ignored, can create conflict later:

• Child support and Section 7 expenses

• Schooling decisions

• Holiday and birthday schedules

• Communication protocols between homes

• Introduction of new partners

• Summer vacations and travel

• Post-secondary education

By addressing these items in advance, parents reduce the risk of disputes. Fairway’s fixed-fee approach ensures these choices are made carefully, not rushed.

Step 5: get professional support

Too many divorced parents end up in family court not because they disagree, but because they lack a structured process. Fairway mediators provide family mediation that combines legal, financial, and parenting expertise. Through the Independently Negotiated Resolution™ process, parents work separately to lower conflict and build healthier parenting agreements.

This approach reduces stress, shortens timelines, and promotes a healthy co parenting relationship.

Why Fairway’s approach works

Since 2006, Fairway Divorce Solutions has helped more than 7,000 families and protected over 13,000 children from the fallout of litigation. With a 95% success rate, most separations are resolved within 120 days at a predictable flat rate.

Fairway’s parenting plans are built to last. They protect children’s best interests, strengthen parent-child relationships, and reduce the chance of future disputes.

Frequently asked questions

What is the Nurtured Children Plan™?

It’s Fairway’s framework for creating secure, flexible, age-appropriate co parenting plans.

Can we adapt the plan as our child grows?

Yes. Parenting agreements are designed to be flexible, and Fairway mediators can help update them as children’s needs change.

How is this different from a court order?

Court-ordered custody often emphasizes division. Fairway focuses on development, collaboration, and the child’s best interest.

Do we have to meet together?

No. With Fairway’s Independently Negotiated Resolution™, separated parents can work individually, lowering tension.